Funny Celebrity Gossip Podcast - The Crescent

Episode 39 - bumper celeb gossip pre christmas issue

crispin read — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 16:55:22 GMT

We worrying about whether there will EVEN be gossip magazines next week > go on about the showcase we went to > and find out what celebrities are doing for Christmas and what they will be eating > in particular posh spice who apparently is havin a panic attack about it > Also in the news is > 5 sex dolls getting a christmas makeover > Cheryl and Dannii frock FACE OFF > Victoria Beckham and Kate Moss BATTLE IT OUT on a red carpet > celebrity heavy petting > WHO turned on WHO'S lights? > WE got no top tips but we did get some proper Proper funny problems in 'Ask Tracey' > FLUID COMES OUT (zomg) > and > THRUSTING technique > also we talkin about 3 legged dogs yep.

playing out with Daddy by Winners

Episode 38 - celebrity gossip with some vampire love and christmas swingers

crispin read — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 00:12:21 GMT

What did we learn today? We leaned that MEESHA Barton is not fucked off her head at the minute so was sober enough for an entire OK photoshoot > Cheryl's Christmas quicky w Ashley > On the fist day of Christmas my true love said to me - "Get out - you're a swinger" > POSH's BUNIONS puke > Danny Dyer chatin on the ol' dog 'n' bone in So Ho innit > Wicker seen Trigger out of/ off of Only Fools and Horses IRL looking at ART > Jesus is a DJ > Brittany Murphy's got a new funny face > Sugababes rejuvinated slag off the one what left for like 4 pages > AC SLATER from Saved by the Bell opens a toilet in NYC > SEX TIP - sexy secret santa - what the flucking fiuck? how is that ever going to work? > office Christmas do advice BULLSHIT > Kerry not on any drugs or drinking - now she goes to bed at 8pm (or something).

Playing out with '4 minute warning' by Portasound

Contact the show? - no one does so if you do you are bound to be on it > tag tweets with #celebz or email us > wicker@sinktherock.org or crispin@sinktherock.org

no no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there's no limit.

Episode 37 - Celebrity Gossip Advent

crispin read — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 19:06:20 GMT

What news of celebrity gossips? well now sit down and behave and Daddy will tell you all about it > FERN IS ON DRUGS - and we check out her fetching leather gastric band > Orlando Bloom and Jennifer Aniston are having it off apaerntly REVEAL has some indisputable evidence > Jedward's telepathic powers OMFG > Cherys Cole's tour of US supermarkets > would would woudl woudl > is it REALLY a global smash? reallyreallyreally? > unconvincing transexual update > We FIND OUT what Vannesa Feltz gets up to in a power cut (OMFGYOUWON'TBELIEVEIT) > Dave at work ate a burrito that was the size of a human stomach > AND > Worst dynamite sex tip so far - SEXY Christmas Cracker...

> Playing out with 'Don't say fuck' by Electric Eel Shock

Episode 36 - Celebrity Gossip in the Jungle > Bring back Jungle music

crispin read — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 00:58:56 GMT

OH EM GEE GOSSIP GOSSIP GOSSIP > Jungle stuart's love rat secret > HOLLYOAKS is like the special school for actors isn't it? > JUngle > Cheryl is livid > Fatcas = Thin >Jungle > Brad and Angelina's real life 'It's a small world' > Jungle > Coleen is back on the piss > RAYYY > and lost weight > RAYYYY > Jungle RAYYY > Ashley cole's special tea > SUBO whattagwaan? > JUNGLE > Carol Giffin Sassy? Fiesty? funny? or just a moody cow? > lots of real life stories goodness > sleep wanking > GET playfull with your lippy > 1 month kinky sex prude OR WHAT?

playing out with 'Sobriety and the woman' by Ben de la Cour

Contact the show? - no one does so if you do you are bound to be on it > tag tweets with #celebz or email us > wicker@sinktherock.org or crispin@sinktherock.org

bring. back. jungle. music.

Episode 35 - celebrity gossip hangover cure

crispin read — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 16:18:18 GMT

ooooh would you look at that > that is what 6 months worth of gossip magazines looks like when you remember to put them out for recycling > and this is what one weeks worth of celebrity gossip magazines sounds like as a sarcastic digest.

THIS WEEK > we are late because it was my birthfday and consequently I have a terrible hangover > Wicker however is PUMPED > Claire from steps is all fat and pregnant > I'm still a celebrity in my head get me back on TV > Cheryl and Ashley to break up after christmas but before new year > THE EYES THE EYES - they can't take any more make-up > real life > Baloon fetish explained (thanks Julie) > AND > Bob from twin peaks lives with 2 real dolls > mazin top tips and Dynamite SEX.

playing out to Everybody Knows by Hyacinth Girl - full choon too not just PRS bitches 30 seconds

I looked at teh download map > We have 7 listeners in Bicester and 55 in Bejing - who are ya? ... give us a wave?

To be on it / in it next week > tag tweets with #celebz or email us > wicker@sinktherock.org or crispin@sinktherock.org

You've let me down, you've let your mother down, and you've let yoursef down x

Episode 34 - High Brow Celebrity Gossip (with swearing)

crispin read — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 01:04:46 GMT

This week i got OK magazine - it is proper posh, like a well high brow gossip mag > Wicker goes all showbiz and is WELL lezzy for Liz Herley > Co-leen eventually popped her sprog > clap clap ten points > there seems to be some confusion about whether or not she is in a rush to lose her baby weight though > Peter Andre standing next to a lady made of dough > We reveal what celebrites are FRIGHTFUL commoners > celeb diets of Dannii Minge and Jackie Collins COMPARED > Kerry Katona free fat fucking - what? > Jordan's illustrated suicide advice > AND > Shine up marble worktops with WHAT? Check out Carly's top tips to find out - I swear to god you will never never guess...

Episode 33 - Celebrity Gossip Gasbags > with Jim Fleeting

crispin read — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 01:26:24 GMT

Joining us in our amazing lives this week is Jim Fleeting > we gasbagging all about X Factor, Dynamite SEX, Drugs and birthdays > ALSO > Cheryl FIGHTS for marriage as we reveal what the three little words are on the front of her Album > Amy Whineclaart's NEW BIG TITS > DAN-YLE starting on the Essex (god help him) > Fatterly Cassidy Happily Snackerly > REAL ACTUAL celeb story from Jim about Ulrika Johnson > YOU are the disablist one NOT ME > AND > Drugs ATE someone's face (don't worry they not famous person)...

I remembered to cue up a song this week as well - playing out w 'Animal Lover' by Hemme Fatale > only 30 seconds tho or the PRS motherfuckers will be on our case.

OH OH OH > here is the picture of Jordan's street wee puddle of piss that I refer to about 10 minutes in:

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=4458661&id=701205294

...and here is what is on at the Red Rose Comedy club this week:

DAVE THOMPSON, PAUL KERENSA, YIANNI AGISILAOU, mc: Mike O'Donovan

To be on it / in it next week > tag tweets with #celebz or email us > wicker@sinktherock.org or crispin@sinktherock.org

TTFN you beautiful, beautiful bastards x x x

Episode 32 - profesional sounding celebrity gossip podcast

crispin read — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 10:01:24 GMT

...well I say professional sounding but I did forget to turn Wickers mic on until half way through > HOWEVER > Happy Halowe'en you beauties > SO > DID Peter Andre get off with his dog? > K-FAT has lost a bit of weight but is still Fatter than me > Jordan and kids hallowe'en photoshoot special > Donatella Vercace and Lindsey Lohan - TWINS > how many hob nobs can Rik Waller eat in a day? > George Clooney does or doesn't look like someones pervy old dad - discuss > is WILD SEX safe? > AND > Ronan says Boyzone WILL carry on without Steven *PHEW* > The other things I forgot to do was get breaking news off Gossip feast, queue a song up for the end and plug The Red Rose Comedy Club (this week is SCOTT CAPURRO, AARON COUNTER, SPECIAL GUEST - MAGNUS BETNER, mc: Mike O'Donovan)

milk milk lemonade
round the corner chocklits made

> ps 15 minutes in I realise that only one mic is on and sort it out.

Episode 31 - Celebrity Gossip Jackpot

crispin read — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 22:24:56 GMT

JACKPOT > there are no fat celebz this week even NATCAS FATCAS is THINCAS > Kelly Osbourn "thinest ever without drugs" (wowowowow) > we debating if or how Kater and Peatee's kids are all fucked up and whose fault it is (a bit like the Write stuff or something but more judgmental and less advised) > Wicker must choose her new boyf - Peter Andre OR a chav what lives in tent > Crispin's new bird is either Stacey or Keisha ~ whoever emails in first > TPT TPT (you have to listen to find out what that is) > Wicker also well lezzy for Pamala Anderson > SEX O'CLOCK - what time does your rape alarm go off? > RIP Kanyee West you were a gay fish > Whitney wazza lezza beanz - says Bobby Brooon > housten we have a semi > next week we might have a song at the end AND we MIGHT have proper sound...

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe,

she had so many children her cunt fell off.

>>>>>message ends<<<<<

At the Red Rose comedy Club this Week:

STEPHEN CARLIN, DANIEL RIGBY, TIFFANY STEVENSON, ELI SILVERMAN

http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/event.php?eid=140862086414&index=1

Episode 30 - Celeb Gossiping with Black Barbie

crispin read — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 11:00:19 GMT

Gossip is the new black (Black Barbie that is) > Nate Lewin is on the sofa spittin out some proper bitchy shit about > La Roux and her daft Sporticus hair > Nicola Roberts as The Corpse Bride > Posh spice ZERO CALORIE FISH AND CHIPS > facebook addict's kid asleeps in a plate of chips *bless* > Danni Minogue's botox *JUSTIFIED* > and SOMEONE needs to have a word with themselves about their top shop dress > Also I done a RAP in the style of Alisha Dixon and I tried to do a link at the end for The Red Rose Comedy Club but i fucked it up a bit so here is a link to thier facebook page:

http://www.facebook.com/home.php#/group.php?gid=124486546840&ref=ts

OI > email us celeb stories and shit > crispin@sinktherock.org

If you believe in life after love - listen to this podcast.

Episode 29 - celebrity gossip > the parties > the dresses > the banal lives of mediocre attention sluts

crispin read — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 00:18:04 GMT

celebz celebz celebz > THIS WEEK > Katie Price divorce party bore > Peter Andre = living joke > Jamie hince fancy dress FAIL > we remind ourselves and you that Take That are now and were always, total shit > and try and remember if any of them are gay > Breaking news from GossipFeast and twitter via @celebwhisperer and @CelebrityDB > Simon Cowel explains a VAGINA to his mum > Relationship advice from Jordan (lol) > Nicole Ritchy rear ended > OMG Jennifer Ellison's GIANT SIZED TITS - terrifying > Top Tips > Dynamite sex > and an interesting theory on the common refraction of light into the visible spectrum from the 'Angel Whisperer'.

I like you - you've got a hot face, can I touch your hot face?

Episode 28 - celebrity gossip quick! we are havin a partee

crispin read — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 16:12:01 GMT

in our AMAZIN celebrity gossip podcast this week we are fucking with your minds > we did the podacast in the MORNING > usual Kater and peatee shit - they arguing about who is still in love with who now - THE COCKS > Micha Barton Canadian tux and Croyden facelift > Some them bitches all specially thin for London fashion week > Kimberly walsh big curvy FACE > Amy Wineclaart's SICK faith healer weirdo Dr. Creepyhands > 2 in the goo one in the poo > £80 a week COKE HABIT > A well fat SEX kitten in lacey underwear > AND > A lady with a 20 STONE BUM > could you ask for more? could you? really? really really really?

Episode 27 - Amazing celebrity gossip photoshoots (talked about in our audio only podcast)

crispin read — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 22:16:20 GMT

AMAZE TOP DRAW photo shoots in OK magazine > proper mental > #1 Jordan with that dressage bloke and his old wife in a hayloft raking up horse shit > AND > #2 Darren Day as all action heros EVER > ALSO > Sugababes breakup - tears before bedtime > Cheryl's fucking hair is THE most important thing > NATCAS lovely steamboat romp shocker > little row about who is not listening to who talking about films > Mischa 'cuckoo' Barton latest little show up job > Nikesh's new secret celeb neighbor > at last we remembered to get some breaking news from GossipFeast.com > and SOMEONE sprayed whiped cream on someoone's ladybits > a knife, a fork, a bottle and a cork - that's the way to spell New York - I really love you guys ~ you are like, SO AMAZIN.

Episode 26 - celebs and gossip at the correct volume

crispin read — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 12:30:54 GMT

OH CRUMBS > Bit of Kate Garraways tit almost fell off > Dani Minogue in never ending story necklace AND WAR film suicide > COATHANGER neck celebz revealed > Pete's divorce day magazine tour> Team Halliwell LOL > how to tell if your teenage kid is snorting coke > we are BOTH lezzy for Kelly Brooke > Jack Tweed in the fraggle wing > how to cut up cheesecake AND > I found the button on garage band that makes it the same volume as other podcasts...

Episode 25 - New theme tune for Celebriy Gossip

crispin read — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 21:36:21 GMT

We got a theme tune > Wicker hadn't heard it > it went on too long > dunno if it really worked out > in celeb gossip land > Brian (The Big Faced Irish Giant) wants his kids back off council chops > all the Strictly Come Dancing lot are already fucking each other it would seem - oh no sorry that was just triksy bullshit > MAN FACTS > Lions are the only cats that cant purr backwards > How Fergie (Princess of Peas not Duchess of Kent) stays 'down to earth' > NATCAS sausage & binbag outfit > and > SOMEONE ate a KIT-KAT - I forget who...